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Sunday Snippets Blog Hop ~ March 10

Sunday_SnippetsOh Yeah! It’s the Sunday Snippets Critique Blog Hop!

In this hop, participants post 250 words of their work in progress to be critiqued.  Then everyone hops around to critique others.  Don’t have a post of your own?  We’d love a critique anyway!  And next time you can sign up yourself (see below)

Want to join up? Click here for the rules, and leave a comment to have your name added to the list.  The more the merrier!


This is another snippet from “The Key”. It happens after Phillis was attacked in her kitchen by an unknown assailant. It is still in first draft so it is very rough!!




Phillis walked back to the kitchen and searched the kitchen cupboard until she found the bottle of Vodka she knew was stashed there. She got a glass and poured herself a stiff drink. She quickly gulped half down and refilled her glass. She took the bottle and glass to the table with her and sat down. She looked at Pal and raised her glass.

“I’m not a drinking girl, but damn I needed this!”

Phillis put the glass up to her mouth and took another long drink. She gave a cough as the booze hit the back of  her sore throat. Why was the man here and why was he trying to kill her? She didn’t think he meant to kill her at first, more like subdue her. Once she fought back and he lost his temper than yeah, he wanted to kill her. But, again why?? She took a deep breath and looked at Pal sitting by the sink watching her. That’s when she noticed the blood.

She hastily put the glass down and rushed over to Pal. “Are you hurt boy?”

Phillis patted him down and then came to realize it was not Pal’s blood but that of the attackers. She grimaced and grabbed a kitchen towel and put it under the hot water tap. After wringing some of the water out she started cleaning the blood off of Pal. He stood quietly and let her fuss over him. He sensed she needed this to settle her nerves. After he was cleaned up to her satisfaction she threw the towel in the garbage.

She gave him another hug and whispered, “I’m so glad you are okay. I can’t lose you too.”



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