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Weekly Writing Challenge: Threes~~Sheila’s Poem

In this week’s writing challenge, you’ll write a post using three photographs for inspiration.

You can choose to write a post inspired by a response to the “Threes” photo challenge, or you can write your post based on three photos you supply.

This week I am going to be different…..again. Yeah, I do that a lot. I am going to post a poem or verse or whatever it’s called. haha! Included is three pictures that relate together and to the verse. It’s a bit different as I did it in collaboration with someone else, who wishes to remain anonymous.

My friend and I were talking via email and this friend was lamenting the fact of their singleness. So with tongue firmly in cheek we came up with this little thing. Hope you enjoy. It’s called Sheila’s Poem (not their real name).

 

 

The Undemanding Girlfriend Poem

by Sheila

My name is Sheila and celibacy

has been my way of life

Strictly have I lived its creed

for nigh on twenty years.

Now is my time to change, to stop

thinking about it and just do it,

Time to be the woman I can be to the fullest.

It will be a challenge, as so many

things in this life are.

I know my bits are all rusty, crusty and musty

But I’m putting myself out there near and far.

I am the ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

Now I will require very little,

Your love and affection, of course

Your loyalty and devotion.

Your understanding that everything up until now

has been my way and no other.

It may take me a while to adjust.

To understand your ways,

I am big on compromise,

So have no fear about that.

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You can  lift the toilet seat up,

but please leave it down.

And when you sit upon the throne,

leave no curly hair deposits in your wake

to make me frown.

I am your ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

I like my tea of a morning,

as the sun tips the horizon in red.

A little cinnamon toast would be a nice touch,

fruit loaf my preferred bread, sliced thin.

Fresh baked that morning,

is the only way to have it, you know.

It’s just a short twenty-minute drive,

to Archies Harbourside Bakery, please don’t be slow.

When back you come, tea and toast

on breakfast tray,

Resplendent with a fresh-cut rose,

You remember I did mention that, no?

I am your ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

As I shower and perform those necessary functions

A lady of beauty must see to each morning to thrive

You’ll clear the breakfast dishes,

wash and wipe up, oh and scrub the kitchen,

you never know when company might arrive.

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When I enter our sitting room,

my morning coffee, ground fresh I’m sure with love,

Will be set upon the glass-topped table,

The one with the starched napkins,

you so graciously provide.

We will sit and enjoy the morning sun.

You leaving me temporarily to fix the bed,

Tucked corners, stretched tight,

fluff my pillows, I’m sure you’ll remember

just how I like them, won’t you have fun!

I am your ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

Beside the pool, the one you so beautifully cleaned,

Sits our pool furniture, the best your money could buy.

Occasionally I will dip my toes into the water,

Call you for the towel, the good one of course

For I cannot afford the risk of getting wet.

My nails, my hair, you understand

I shall help you my love in the garden,

I am experienced in horticultural pursuits.

Our garden will look a picture,

with your muscle and my ideas we can’t fail.

Don’t forget your boots.

I have gifted you every garden tool

you will ever need to use,

to keep the weeds at bay.

I will be happy to supervise as you

trim  the orchids, roses and

my favorite petunias too.

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I am your ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

Our lives will be lived in constant bliss,

I will guide you,

lead you to perfection

It won’t kill you but you may

feel a little off a bit.

But my love, what can be gained

without a little pain?

Our love will be cemented,

our lives self-directed

My love will be there for you,

Ticked off as you complete each

little task I ask of you.

I’m sure you will handle

the south wing renovations.

I saw your bank account my love,

You have more than enough

to cover the costs.

Though if you paint it yourself,

it will save you a lot.

What a life we have ahead of us,

for me to awaken each day

seeing your back heading

to the kitchen,

Knowing with all your love

you are preparing my tea.

As I doze in the half-light of dawn.

You do your little bit

to make this relationship the treasure it is.

I am your ultimate undemanding girlfriend of your dreams.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Abandoned, 03.03.14 | Markie’s Daily Blog

30 thoughts on “Weekly Writing Challenge: Threes~~Sheila’s Poem

  1. Wonderful Jackie, I must take all necessary steps to avoid any woman such as this. I did like the line, about the pool furniture, being the best ‘your’ money could buy. Well done. Great images as well.

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  2. Hilarious. I think Shiela might have been single just a while too long. I wish her luck in her search – she’s going to need it.

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  3. You and your friend did a super job with this! It’s very different. I was giggling inappropriately as soon as I read this line: “I know my bits are all rusty, crusty and musty.” 🙂

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