How’s the new year treating you so far? Yes, I know, it’s early yet.
I have another short story I wrote on this blog when I first started it. It was the second short story I posted, so it did need some editing. Oh, I was such a newbie back then. You can read the original here.
Enjoy! Remember, I love comments! So go ahead and tell me what you think, be honest, I can’t learn if I get no feedback is the way I look at it.
Jenny lay in the dark, frightened and feeling so alone. She was so tired, yet she fought sleep with every breath she drew. Afraid to close her eyes, she watched the shadows of the tree outside her window play on her bedroom ceiling.
She tried to convince herself for the umpteenth time that there was nothing to be afraid of. It was her overactive imagination that was messing with her. Her mother always told her she needed to stop living in the clouds and stop believing in make-believe.
Losing the fight, her eyes slowly closed. A few seconds later her lids flew open and she gasped. Eyes wild, breathing heavy, Jenny knew it was no dream. When her eyes were closed is when she saw, well she wasn’t sure what it was she saw. A shadow? Yes, a shadow was the best way to describe it. And yet, it was more than a shadow. It had substance, a form, a feeling about it.
A ghost? No, Jenny shook her head, it couldn’t be a ghost. You saw those with your eyes open. She didn’t see anything strange when her eyes were open. Only when they were closed. A dream? No! She knew she wasn’t dreaming. She might not be wide awake, but she wasn’t dreaming either. It was so frustrating not being able to explain to herself what it was she was afraid of.
That’s why she was afraid to sleep. She hadn’t had a good night’s rest since she moved into this house. Her first real home, all hers. It was turning more into a nightmare than a dream come true. From that first night, she saw the shadow when she closed her eyes. Didn’t matter if it was night or day, if she wanted to sleep, it was there. Always lurking.
It didn’t do anything. Jenny wasn’t even sure why she was afraid. She thought it was because it should do something! Anything! But, in all these months it was just there. She sensed it was male. Why? She wasn’t sure. That’s just what her senses told her. It was male, and it wanted something from her. Or it wanted her.
Jenny’s heart jumped, one day she thought, one day she will fall asleep and the shadow will make its move. Jenny felt her stomach clench with fear. What did it want? She should move, but she hated the thought of giving up her dream home. Her thoughts jumped from one thought to another. Oh, she was so tired! All she wanted was a good night’s sleep. That’s all she needed, it would clear her mind, help her with deciding what she should do. So tired…….. she was so very tired.
Jenny could feel her lids closing. She couldn’t push back sleep anymore. She took one last deep breath, felt her heart pound, and then slowly she fell asleep.
The shadow smiled and moved forward, she was his.
12 thoughts on “Flash Back Friday”
Freaky! Good job, dear! 🙂
Thanks kiddo! 🙂
Excellent piece of writing Jackie, very engaging and vivid in imagery.
Aw man! Now I can’t go to sleep. That was good. A nice twist on the ending.
You got to be careful of the shadow man. Thanks Marlene! Have a good nights sleep. 🙂
Oooh, happy I read this in the morning…! Freaky good! Have a great weekend (I’m w grandkids) !
Thanks tiny! Enjoy your weekend with the grandkids! Big hugs!
I had bad fears as a kid too…so many times my dad would come in my room and we would look for monsters. Nice story. 🙂
And that’s why I take drugs to sleep. 🙂
that will work. 🙂
I missed your stories, they are the highlight of my day. This was a good one, you have a story here you could build on into a novel.
I miss writing the stories. I’m going to try to get back into them. Thanks Lois.
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