My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures · nonfiction · postaday

My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures ~~ Dec. 15, 2016

I have to admit to feeling a bit blue lately. Ok, a lot. I do get melancholy sometimes. I think we all do.

For the past month or more, it’s been more than melancholy for me. Like many people I usually get a bit down this time of year. A bit sad, a bit reflective. My mood has been even more than that. It borders on depression.

I had depression years ago. I mean I was down that dark, deep hole of blackness so far I thought I would never crawl out.

I did crawl out, though. It took me several years, a divorce and suicidal thoughts (not necessarily in that order)….but I did it. I crawled out and never crawled back in. I’ve been close to the brink of that hole a few times. I always caught myself before I fell in.

Many people see me as a strong woman. I don’t consider myself strong. I consider myself a survivor. Plain and simple. I survived my abusive childhood. I survived a rotten first marriage to a man bent on destroying me. I survived several attempts on my life. I survived….I survive…..I am a survivor.

But, am I strong? I don’t know. Most days I don’t think so. I certainly don’t feel it.

So today, I felt the need to write down some things I’m grateful for. Something for my soul to hold on to. Something to help this emotional cripple to keep waking up every morning. I find it helps…..sometimes.

I will not fall down that black hole.

 

The Incomplete

 

Friends. They make me smile even when I don’t feel like it. They make me think with the words that they write. They make me feel like maybe….just maybe….I’m not alone after all.

My dog Sam. He cuddles with me every night. He helps me feel like I mean something to someone, even if it’s just a small 8lb dog. Most days he’s the only other living thing that ever physically touches me.

Distractions. Books, blogs, writing, things that make me come out of my shell and look at things differently. Sometimes it helps to have a different perspective.

Optimism. Even though I’ve been staring at that deep, dark hole lately, in my heart there beats my optimism. I will be ok. Things will be ok. My life can change on a whim. It has before, it will again. Usually for the better. All things are temporary.

The holiday season. Even though I tend to get a bit down this time of year, my heart sings at all the good things that usually come out of this holiday season. The cheerful lights. The jolly Santa’s. The ever-present snowmen. The feeling in the air that things might….just might….improve. Human nature’s spirit is unquenchable. Even if this past year has been damn hard for many reasons for many people we as humans keep trying to move forward to make this a better place. The bigger the obstacles the more determined we are to overcome them.

 

So make your own list of small pleasures, even if it’s just in your own head and heart. It still makes a difference.

 

christmas-baubles-1806968_640

 

 

 

Mi Vida Loca · My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures · nonfiction · postaday

My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures ~~~ May 9, 2016

This is an ongoing list I do every now and then. It helps to remind myself that no matter how bad a day I’m having or what worries I have, there are still small pleasures to be found. I just have to look for them.

Feel free to make a list of your own. Let me know if you do by linking to this one. Thank you and I hope everyone has a wonderful week.

 

The Incomplete

 

 

It’s raining here in Alberta, Canada. Finally, we are getting much-needed and wanted moisture from Mother Nature. This is especially welcome news for the Fort McMurray wildfire that has been burning out of control for days now. My heart goes out to all the people affected. If you haven’t heard, more than *80,000 people have been evacuated from Fort McMurray. It’s burned more than *1600 square Kilometers (994 miles) and still going strong. If anyone is interested in donating to the Red Cross to help these Canadians here is the number to call, 1-800-418-1111. (Fort McMurray is about a nine-hour drive north from me.)

Friends who make me smile. I have some of the best friends in the world. I have yet to meet them face to face but I still consider them my best friends. They listen to me whine and bitch and manage to keep me from sinking into the deep black hole of depression with their sense of humor. I’m a better person for them being in my life.

My mom. She is the strongest woman I know.

Electric screwdrivers. Ha! Bet you never expected that one! I put up some mini blinds and it was nice to have one of these babies to help.

Writing. It saves my sanity some days.

Doctors who listen. Finally got the husbands chemo dose lowered. Maybe he will be able to tolerate it now. Only two more months to go.

People who have great hearts. It got hot here last week. I mean hotter than it should be for the beginning of May. It was 90 something in the house. I turned on the air and it didn’t work. Nothing. Nada. Called a friend who sent over another friend who works on them for a living. He was over that night and fixed it. Didn’t charge us anything. Said we could buy him a beer one day. (It was the same kind man who fixed our furnace this past winter) There really are good people out there.

Good neighbors. A neighbor kid, (well I say kid but he’s probably twenty something) cut our grass the other day. I was worried how I was going to get it cut as of course there is no way the husband can do it. I can’t either with my bad knee and asthma. Asked the neighbor kid and he said he would do it. Which he did. Unfortunately, he’s leaving here soon, otherwise, he said he would do it all summer. He has the cutest  man bun too. haha!

Black jelly beans. They are my favorite as they used to be my dads. I can’t have them often but when I do……nom, nom, yum.

 

 

*from this news site…..here.

 

 

 

 

Mi Vida Loca · My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures · nonfiction · postaday

The Incomplete List of Small Pleasures ~~~ April 4, 2016

This is something I started a few weeks ago. It’s just a list of small pleasures for the day, hour, minute. Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed and frustrated it’s good to look for the small pleasures in life. There are always some…no matter how bad a day you’re having. Certain times that seem the toughest is when we should really look for those small pleasures. Today just seemed right for another list.

Feel free to make your own list. If you do link back and let me know as I would love to read them.

 

 

The Incomplete

 

 

  • Spring weather…even though it makes my allergies act up, I still love to watch the temperature climb and things turn green and leafy.
  • Friends….those the reach out to make sure I’m ok, or just to chat.
  • Words….words strung together that make me smile, think or feel good. I’m in love with words.
  • My cats….they caught their first springtime mouse this morning. Yes, in the house. We are surrounded by fields and it’s that time of the year. Good kitties.
  • Hearing aids and the husband wearing them! haha! True. Otherwise, the TV would blast me out of the house or my mind. Possibly both.
  • Hot coffee….Now you know I had to add that at some point. 😉
  • My new dishwasher. I went without for three years and hated doing the dishes every day. I sure appreciate just loading them in the dishwasher, pushing a button and walking away. Ahhh, feels good.
  • Not having to go to the emergency room this past weekend. The husband was pretty sick. We managed to stay out of the hospital. I think it was a flu bug he caught at the store from someone. His resistance is way down because of the chemo. He is on solid foods again and feeling tons better. Every day is an adventure in this house.

 

That’s my list for now. Could change later today. Who knows.

What would be on your list right now?