She Giggled at the Word Vagina

**update** As of 5:40 pm mountain time today, Wednesday May 25, 2016 My mom passed away. Thank you for all your sympathy and well wishes for me and my family at this time. ❤ Good-bye Mom, I love you, tell Dad hi.

 

I’ve been pretty quiet since late last week. No posts, very little interacting on blogs. A couple of good friends know why. I emailed them over the weekend.

It’s been a tough time for me and going to be tougher the next little bit. It’s something I’ve expected the last few months, yet, now that the time is here….it’s almost unbearable. You see, my mom is dying. She has very little time left. We are talking hours here now, according to her doctors in Wisconsin.

I talked to her the day after Mother’s day and noticed she sounded very tired and wore out. Her sense of humor was still intact though as her and I laughed over something silly. The month before she had lost most of the use of her legs. They just gave out on her, so she was using a walker. We joked that her and my husband could have a walker race. She laughed and stated that she would win. That’s how she was. She accepted things and worked them to her advantage. She is the strongest person I know.

When I talked to my sister on Friday and she told me that mom was in the hospital and wasn’t expected to live much longer, my mind went to that last bit of silliness and that’s when the tears flowed. My mother loved life. She was a diminutive person with a larger than life personality. She IS…..She IS….soon to be WAS but not just yet.

 

JLPhillips 2013 (c)
JLPhillips 2013 (c)

 

Many of my readers know about my mom as I’ve written about her several times. We even gave her a great birthday last year when a lot of you sent her birthday cards. She was so happy when she got all those cards and recipes. I’m glad I was able to do that for her with your help. Thank you.

My mom would have turned eighty-seven in October of this year. That’s a long life. Her body is just worn out the doctors told my sister. After years of dialysis and various other illness’, her small frame could not handle any more.

I won’t be able to go and say good-bye to her. I don’t have the funds. I also have a sick husband to take care of. I feel slightly better knowing my mom and I discussed this very issue several months ago. She understood that I wouldn’t be able to come to her funeral when the time came. I have responsibilities here. She was good with it. It still hurts me. So much.

My sister and I have been talking on the phone every day since the initial call on Friday. If nothing else, this has brought her and I back together, at least for now. As many of you know, we hadn’t been on speaking terms for years. I don’t know why and this is not the time to ask. I’m just grateful for now.

She has all her funeral arrangements made and paid for. She did this right after Dad died. She’s going to be cremated and her ashes will be scattered close to where she scattered my Dad’s. She said she wanted to be close to him. My sister is going to scatter her ashes under the apple trees that dad planted shortly before he died. It’s also where there are rose bushes planted. She’d like that.

Her services will be at the Webber Hill funeral home in Wabeno, Wisconsin. Just like Dad’s. I know her and Dad will be happy to be together once more if that’s what happens in the afterlife. I like to think so. If anyone would like to send a card, please email me or contact me through my contact page and I will give you the address to send them to. Since my mom enjoyed all the wonderful birthday cards last year, I know she would get a kick out of these. My sister says she will set up a board at her services with all the cards tacked on.

As for the title of this post ‘She Giggled at the word Vagina’, there is a story to this. Years ago my dad or someone else (this part I’m fuzzy at) told her a joke about vaginas. She thought it was hilarious and she laughed and giggled. Anytime after that if someone just mentioned the word vagina she would throw up her hands and go “Oh! Hahahahahah.” She just thought the word itself was so funny and it never failed to make her giggle and laugh like a schoolgirl. It was fun to see and hear.

That’s what I remember the best….that laugh. That special laugh.

 

 

 

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39 thoughts on “She Giggled at the Word Vagina

  1. My thoughts are with you in this difficult time, Jackie. I lost my mother three years ago, same age as your mom. My mother suffered from Alzheimer’s the last few years of her life. She was a little girl again, living with her mother, father, and two older sisters. Her younger brother and sister hadn’t been born yet. That was her world when she passed. Godspeed to you and yours.
    –Michael

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  2. Holly

    I’m so sorry you are having to go through this, Jackie. I love the card idea. Love and peace be with you, her and the rest of your family during this transition time.

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  3. This is something most of us have to face, losing our beloved parents. My mum died last year at the amazing age of 94 (short of about 4 weeks) and it seems to me that the longer you have your mum, the harder it is when she goes. I feel for you, my friend, especially as you can’t go to the funeral. But your mum will always be close to you and you don’t really need to say goodbye but if you have to, then you can just say farewell to her in your heart and she will know. I believe this. I don’t write the books I do without reason.
    Thinking of you and your sister; I’m glad that your rift with your sister is now behind you and I’m sure that makes your mom happy too.
    With love, Jeanette

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    1. Thank you, Jeanette. I do think my mom knows I love her and I’ve said goodby in my heart. I believe she’s aware of that. As for me and my sister, time will tell.

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  4. Jackie, I am so sorry to gear of your moms passing and the grief you are feeling right now. hold on to those memories and don’t beat yourself up about missing her last days or her funeral. She’s with you wherever you are.

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  5. JackieP, I extend my condolence at the death of your mother. I know the pain as I also lost mine in 1998.

    You’re a strong, spiritual person and you’ll handle yourself well in this situation. Time eventually heals wounds. She’ll continue to live on in your heart.

    A video recording of the funeral, or the important parts of it, sent to you, can help to makeup for your absence from the religious service and the gravesite itself, and save the moment to posterity.

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  6. I’m not good on things to say in situations like this, but you and your family certainly have my condolences. I recall several times you commented about your mother’s personal war on the squirrels and despite my obvious conflict of interest it always made me smile. Hugs.

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  7. Oh honey, my heart aches for you. Losing someone you love, especially a parent, is never easy. If you need to talk you know I’m always here. *hugs*

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  8. There is nothing I can say that will make it better. I didn’t get along with my mother until the last few years of her life. We finally reached an understanding and I’m going to tell you it shocked the hell out of me how unglued I came when she died at just shy of 75. I had a mini meltdown and a complete disconnect. You never stop missing your mom no matter how rough the relationship was. I feel her around me often and we still talk. When they are so ill, you are grateful their suffering has ended but you miss them with every fiber of your being. Mom has been gone 15 years and it still feels raw. You have a strong support system here. Hang on. Giant hugs, my friend. With deepest sympathy.

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    1. Thank you, Marlene. As you know, like you, I didn’t get along with my mom until the last ten or so years, after my dad died. It is raw and hurts and I haven’t really cried yet and that scares the hell out of me. It’s like it’s just building inside. I appreciate my support system on here more than I can express. My friends are wonderful. Giant, huge hugs back.

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