Posted in Blogging, stories, Truth or Fiction, writing

Truth or Fiction

Hello everyone and welcome to another week of Truth or Fiction. The comments and guesses were split last week. Was the story true or fiction?

Truth! Yes, it really did happen. I was living in Texas at the time with the ex. We lived next to a field of cows and yes, one cow was having trouble giving birth so we helped it out as it was a life or death situation for the poor cow. The only difference in the story was my ex actually did the turning of the calf. We did use dish soap and one of our dogs alerted us to the cow. According to the rancher, the dish soap didn’t harm the cow or calf. I didn’t think it would (it was my idea) as most of it seemed to come out of the cow with the birth.

About the only redeeming quality of my ex was that he was good to animals. His marriage skills needed the work.

Thank you once again to those of you who joined me last week. Now, let’s see what this week’s story is about.

 

Pixabay

 

Lessons To Learn

 

“The way you flirt is shameful.”

I laughed, “That wasn’t flirting. That was just being friendly.”

“You always do that to get your way. Flirt. It’s second nature to you.”

“I wasn’t flirting!”

Turning my chair towards my co-worker, I frowned and wondered what got her panties in a twist this morning. Millie was usually so cheerful and upbeat but today she seemed to complain about everything. I saw her eyes fill up with tears and her lower lip tremble. Yes, definitely something was wrong with her.

“Millie? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”

She turned away from me and her shoulders hunched over her desk. Walking over to her I put my hand on her shoulder and asked her again what was wrong.

“Everything!”, she cried. “My whole life is a mess and nobody cares.”

Usually, I run away from such dramatics. Stresses me out but this was Millie and since coming to work for this company she has always been a constant source of smiles and cheerfulness. Until today. Something had to be seriously wrong for her to turn into this mess of tears and drama.

“Come on, Mill, tell me what’s going on.”

“I’m in love and I hate it!” And with that statement, she went into full-blown, snot forming, eye swelling, red nose crying.

“Well, usually being in love is a good thing. So, I take it he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings?”

“I don’t know!”, she wailed. “I’ve never talked to him.”

That statement set me back a second. Never talked to him? Who was this love of her life and why in hell has Miss Never Knew a Stranger never talked to him? The mystery deepens.

“Ok, hold on a second. You are in love with someone you never talked to? Am I correct?”

Snuffling into her kleenex she nodded her head.

“Um, Mill…is this a real person? Or is this a character in one of your favorite books?” I was just checking for accuracy because with Millie it could be either.

“Of course he’s real.” And with that statement, she went off into another round of tears.

“OK, ok. Just wanted to make sure I got my facts straight.” I patted her shoulder and the tears slowed down. “So tell me why you two have never talked and where you met this man.”

“We haven’t met. That’s the problem. I see him every morning in the coffee shop I stop at on the way to work. He’s cute and I love him.” She looked at me, almost like she was challenging me to say something smart-alecky. I didn’t.

I could see this man meant a lot to her even if they never exchanged a word.

“Why don’t you start a conversation? You always do here. You never seem to have nothing to say to anyone who comes in the office.”

“This is different. I don’t love the people who come into the office so I don’t worry if I look like a fool to them.”

“Ahhh, I see.” I did too. It’s always just a little harder to talk to someone if you’re always worried about how they view you.

“I want to be like you. I want to be able to flirt and not care what others think. I want to flirt with HIM but I don’t know how.”

With that statement, the tears started to flow once again. Then an idea came to me.

“Millie, what if I teach you how to flirt? You could flirt with him and win his love!” I wasn’t sure how I was going to do it but I needed to stop the tears again. Good thing it was a slow day at work or this could have gotten really embarrassing fast.

“Is something like that teachable?” Millie asked with doubt in her voice. Hell if I knew, but if it stopped her from crying I’d give it a shot. I thought to myself, well how hard could it be? A slow smile at him, a longish look. Sure that’s teachable, wasn’t it?

We would soon find out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ok folks, is this story true or is it fiction? Let me know! Do you think flirting is something that can be taught? Or is it something someone is born with? 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures, nonfiction

My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures ~~ November 10, 2016

Hello, People!

This has been a tough week for many people, like my friends in the states, as it was election week. Whew! That one was certainly one for the books, eh?

I’ve been reading so many posts on here and Facebook that are full of disappointment, fear, and anger. Friends are arguing, family members are fighting and even strangers are blasting each other.

Nothing new for Facebook users I’m afraid, but I’ve sensed this underlying thread of something….not sure if it’s just fear or something more. Uncertainty I think.

A huge uncertainty for the future of many people.

Now this is not going to be a political post. I don’t do those. Was I disappointed in the election? Yes, I was. I’m a United States Citizen, living in Canada. I love both countries. I think what a lot of people fail to see is this……One man can not run the country. Even if he has a god complex. That’s just not how it works.

Anything he wants to do has to be approved by many. That’s how democracy works. The only thing that gives me hope is that the man will have many more “handlers” now than in civilian life.

Now, me, I wonder how he plans to redecorate the white house? Hmm, will it turn out to be the ‘Gold House’? 😉

That’s about as political as I will ever get. Enough said on that subject. Let’s move on to my list…….

The Incomplete

Sunshine ~~ Ah, even when I feel bad, as long as the sun is shining I have hope that things will get better.

Friends ~~ I love my friends. They cheer me up, make me laugh, and make me feel like I belong.

My dog Sam ~~ A day without Sam would be a dark day indeed. How so much love can be inside a small eight-pound bundle of fur is beyond me. He accepts me at my worst and cuddles me until I’m ‘me’ again. I love this little dog so much.

Sweet smelling candles ~~ A flickering light, tantalizing fragrance, a feeling of zen, right in my own little room. Blissful.

My stubbornness ~~ It makes me get up and do things even when I feel like crap. It keeps me moving. Otherwise, I’m afraid I would lay down and never get back up some days.

Other people’s talents ~~ There are so many talented people out there. Writers that make me strive to be a better writer. Singers who make me feel each line. Poets who make me appreciate that written word. Artists who make me smile with their drawings, paintings, and carvings.

Beauty in this world ~~ Which there is plenty of it if one looks for it. Take a look around and then try to tell me I’m wrong. No matter how bleak things can look there is always a beauty close by. It might be hidden but you can see it if you try.

tumblr_static_tumblr_static__640

 

 

Tell me something that gives you pleasure. 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Cee's Share Your World, Mi Vida Loca, nonfiction

Share Your World – Week 41 2016

Today I’m going to share another session of Cee’s Share Your World. Why not visit Cee and see what it’s all about and read other bloggers great answers.

love-at-first-sight

Do you believe in love at first sight?

I’ve never experienced love at first sight, so I’m undecided. I know many people have said they believe as it has happened to them. I’ll keep an open mind about it.

Your first car?

My first car was bought when I was in my mid-twenties. It was a baby blue 1970 something Mustang. I paid two hundred dollars for it through my father-in-law at the time. He was an insurance adjuster in Texas and he got it because it was hail damaged. He wrote it off and I bought it. I loved that car. It looked like crap on the outside but that thing had a big engine in it and it would go!

Who taught you to ride a bike? How did it go?

I really don’t remember who taught me to ride a bike. Probably my sister or older kids in the neighborhood. I rode other kid’s bikes until my dad bought me my own when I was sixteen. It must have gone ok, as I managed to ride it and not crash it. Much…….

Ugly and rich or beautiful and poor?

I have never been materialistic and I’m used to being poor so I guess it’s probably ‘average looking and poor’. Ha!

What was the first dish you could cook?

I began cooking at a pretty young age, so I’m guessing it was eggs or something equally easy. I was cooking whole meals by the age of ten and as that was many, many moons ago, I don’t really remember. I also took cooking in Home Ec (when it was called that and when it was taught, again a long time ago!).

cover-home-ec-101

 

Hope you enjoyed the questions and answers today. So tell me….what was the first dish YOU cooked and when?

 

 

 

 

Posted in Blogging, Mi Vida Loca, nonfiction, postaday, Stories of my life, Wednesday Whatever!

Wednesday Whatever!

Wednesday

 

 

This week  has been a week of reflection. Today is only Wednesday so I imagine the rest of the week will be much the same.

I know I haven’t posted much this month. I took an unplanned month off of writing, of posting, of doing much of anything, really. I can’t even blame it on an active social life, as I don’t have one. All my friends are online. I don’t have anyone here that I go out for coffee with, that I go shopping with, that I just hang with. I hang with my computer, my dog Sam and sometimes the husband.

Don’t feel sorry for me. I don’t feel as if I’m missing out. At one time I had all those things. Good friends that I had coffee with, shopped with, or just hung out with. So I know what it’s like to have all that. It might seem strange to you that I much prefer how I am now. Today. Right this minute. On my computer typing out words that my friends will read.

Do I ever get lonely? You might ask that. The short answer…No. No, I very rarely get lonely. I enjoy my solitary lifestyle. It’s not for everyone. The husband hates being alone. In fact, he gets depressed if he’s alone for too long. He enjoys people. Being with people, talking, joking, laughing, drinking, whatever he and his friends do together. He enjoys that interaction and he misses it when he doesn’t get it. He is the type of person who needs other people around, he thrives on it. Unfortunately, since he got so sick and can’t do much physically his ‘friends’ have faded into the background.

This hurts him. He doesn’t understand it.

I do. Sort of.

The past year or so has been rough. Hell, the past four years have been rough. I don’t feel sorry for myself. It has shown me just how strong I can be. That’s always a good thing.

When my mom died at the end of May it hit hard. Not because my mom and I were best friends or that we had a tight bond. We weren’t and we didn’t. My mom and I had a rocky relationship since the day I was born. That’s ok. She taught me how to be strong and how to be my own woman. I guess you could say she taught me the true meaning of ‘tough love’. It was tough to love her. But I did. I just didn’t always like her. Or her me.

A few people know I have written my autobiography. I haven’t published it. I wouldn’t publish it while my mother was still alive. Now that she’s gone? I probably still won’t publish it. Not yet. Maybe never. It’s not pretty. I’m not even sure if it would have a happy ending. Because my life is still ongoing. For now.

The writings have a lot of my mom in them. She was never the hug you, compliment you, tell you she loves you type of mother. I never heard those words from her. “I love you.” Never. Not once. My sister and I had a conversation the other week and we discussed our mother and never hearing those words from her. It bothers my sister. It doesn’t bother me. Why? Because I accept that was the kind of woman my mother was. My sister has a harder time accepting that. That’s her right. I don’t try to persuade her otherwise.

The only time I heard my mother say, “I’m sorry” was for something she never did. Which seems strange, as she did plenty. Yet, the only time I heard her apologize to me was for something that was never in her control. My sexual abuse. She never even knew about it until I was an adult. Then she had to ask me outright if I was abused by the person who abused me for years. I told her the truth. That I was. She cried and kept telling me she was sorry.

I told her she had nothing to be sorry for in that instance. It wasn’t her fault. I couldn’t tell her when I was a child and it was happening. And later. Well, what was the point of hurting her so much? So I said nothing. Until she asked me.

My mother was who she was. I am who I am. So we never mentioned it again.

So many memories surfaced when my mother died. Then I received a box from my sister this week. It was filled with memories. With pictures and items from my mother’s house. I looked at all those pictures. Some of so very long ago. Of me. My mother. My dad. And I became reflective.

I called my sister and thanked her for the pictures. As I didn’t have any before that. Not a one. The reason why is another long story I might tell some day. Again. As it’s already a part of my autobiography.  And again, it’s a story of me and my mother.

So, I guess, in a long about way, I’m saying why I took an unplanned month off from blogging. Life’s memories got in the way. Mix that in with just being tired to the bone and you have the recipe for doing nothing. Or almost nothing. For a month.

I’m catching my breath back again. With the help of my friends. Here. Now. You. I will be ok.

Thank you.

 

Posted in Humor, Mi Vida Loca, My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures, nonfiction, postaday

My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures ~~ June 23, 2016

I haven’t done one of these in a while, so today I thought would be a good day to do My Incomplete List of Small Pleasures.

 

The Incomplete

 

 

  • Friends….they make me laugh, smile, think and enjoy. I have some very good friends on here. Thank you all! ❤
  • Sunshine…..it’s hard to feel too down when I step outside and the sun is shining, the birds are singing and the bees are buzzing. I’m so glad I can enjoy it all.
  • Writing….it has saved my sanity. It helps me feel like I’ve accomplished something in life. Finally.
  • Music….When I’m feeling really low as I have the past few weeks since mom died, music has soothed me. I listen to it and it helps calm my soul.
  • Reading….I’ve been doing a whole lot of reading lately. If I’m not listening to music, I’m reading. I’ve been reading books that take me away for a while, that pull me into another world and let me forget about some things.
  • My dog Sam….. Most of you know how much I love this little dog. He seems to know when I need extra attention. He will even let me hug him (he hates getting hugged). At night when we first go to bed, we have this little hugging session. Then he lays as close to me as he can and lays his head on my stomach. It makes me feel better.

sam

  • Good hearted people…… They are out there folks. After I read about all the horrible things people can do to others my heart warms when I find one that is friendly and warm-hearted.
  • The inventor of the electric fan……. Really. It’s been a bit on the warm side here this week and I have fans all over the house. Especially in my bedroom. Not only do they cool me off, they provide that necessary ‘white sound’ that I need to go to sleep. So yay, Mr. Inventor! (I would Google who invented it, but I’m lazy)
  • List posts……..Because without them, my blogging days would be even less lately. ha!

 

 

 

 

What’s your pleasures today?

 

 

 

Posted in Mi Vida Loca, Monday Meeting, nonfiction

Monday Meeting ~~ June 13, 2016

It’s been quite a while since I wrote one of these Monday Meeting posts. So grab yourself something to drink and sit a spell.

 

Monday Meeting

 

Let me just freshen my coffee and I’ll tell you what I’ve been up to.

Ah, there we go. So, how is everyone doing? I’ve read about the terrible shooting in Orlando. So sad. I’ve read a lot of comments on posts about the shooting and let me ask you something…..has everyone gone completely crazy?? I tell you the comments are almost as bad as the shooting! People! Where has your common sense gone? Where is your compassion? Your love of other human beings? It saddened me that there were so many hateful comments. So many people took the opportunity to rant about the US government and blame Obama once more. Obama is no more to blame than I am! Come on people. One man went in there. One man made the decision to shoot those people. One man decided he was more important, more worthy, more whatever and decided to kill a bunch of strangers. One man with a gun. And his name wasn’t Obama.

Then, of course, you had comments that went off the rail about gun control. I won’t even go there. People need to wake up and smell the gun powder……but enough said on that also. My blog is not going to be the stomping ground for arguments. I won’t go there. I just feel so terribly sad for the many people affected by one man’s decision. The world is a scary, scary place where you have a place with little gun control and possibly a future president that is just as crazy and egotistical as the shooter.

I love my homeland, the USA but I’m so very sad of where it is right now and where it’s heading.

That’s about as political as I’ll ever get on here. Sorry folks. Just had to get it out there.

On to more personal news. The husband is finished with his chemo treatments. Yay!! This was his last month of them. He says he’s feeling better and his stomach seems to be doing much better. We have one more visit with the Cancer Clinic at the end of the month. Of course, he will have to have another CAT scan and colonoscopy to make sure everything is ok. They have already told us that he will have to be monitored for the next three to five years to make sure he stays cancer free. Still, it’s good to hear him say he’s feeling better.

That’s not going to help his health in other ways. He will always be disabled and in pain because of his back but at least we don’t have to worry too much about cancer now. And believe me, that was one big worry. It will also mean fewer pills for him to take, fewer doctor visits, less hospital visits. Less of a lot of things. So, it’s all good.

As for me. I seem to be in limbo. Ever since my mom died a couple of weeks ago, I feel like I’m just treading water. One good thing that has come out of it is that my sister and I are talking again. We are back to being friends……well…..back to being sisters anyway. Maybe the friend part will come later. I call her every weekend and we talk for a couple of hours. It’s nice. Especially since I was feeling a bit adrift as I used to call my mom every weekend.

Otherwise, I’ve been reading. A lot. One book after another. It’s what I seem to fall back on when I’m grieving. I remember I did it when I found out dad had died too. I just buried myself in books. Maybe I’m hiding. I don’t know. It’s my way to deal with things. I haven’t been writing. I just can’t seem to settle long enough to write. I do hope it will pass. I’m sure it will. Do you think it will?

I’ve also been cleaning house. Getting rid of stuff we don’t use. Just overall cleaning. It tires me out so I can sleep at night. It also makes me sore as hell but the place is looking good! I found out I’m not as young as I used to be. I tell you this getting older is hell. Things I used to do with ease, even ten years ago, is much harder now. I have aches where I never had them. Sigh. I hate that part of growing older. Better than the alternative, eh.

So, as with life, there have been bad things and good things going on. I’m hoping for more good for a while. I need to step back from the bad…..just for a bit longer…..and adjust.

 

 

 

How have you been lately?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Mi Vida Loca, nonfiction, poetry, Stories of my life

In Memory of Mom

As many of you know, my mom passed away last Wednesday. Later today is her funeral. There will be a viewing from 4 -7 pm in Wabeno, Wisconsin with a service afterward. After that, she will be cremated and her ashes scattered close to where my dad’s ashes were scattered years before.

I won’t be there in physical form, as I live in Canada now, but I most certainly will be there in spirit. I’m sure, if she can, mom knows my heart is with her. I’m also sure her services will be lovely.

Since I can’t be there to pay my respects, I thought I would dedicate this post to her. It’s not really a poem, more like free-falling thoughts.

This one’s for you, Mom. I love and miss you.

 

IN MEMORY OF

 

 

Mom

I won’t pretend that you were an angel

Now that you’re gone

You would have hated that description

I won’t pretend that you were perfect,

As we both knew you weren’t

You were happy just being you in all your

imperfections

You had a fast temper and your brown eyes would snap

with fire as you told whoever displeased you to…

knock it off!”

You could hold a grudge better than anyone I ever knew

You didn’t give an inch, as I know all too well

personally

If you thought someone had done you wrong

there was no forgiving

You could be stubborn to a fault

But I had to admire your convictions

that utter belief in one’s self

You and I had a tumultuous relationship

all of my life

Yet I never stopped respecting you

and wanting your approval

Never thought of not loving you

As my mom

You were the strongest woman I know

You taught me to be strong

I’m grateful for that

I just wish you could have taught me

how to deal with the pain of losing you

You lived a long life of eighty-six years

I know not all of those years were good

You had to go through some tough times

Some painful experiences

In the end, though there were lots of good years

good memories, great loves

In the last few years

I believe we came to a silent agreement

to love and respect each other

despite our differences

Maybe I’m more like you than I realized

I do hope so

Wherever you are

I know you are with Dad again

and that makes the parting

a little easier to handle

Take his hand, Mom, as you did in life

and be content with the life you left behind

You will always be loved

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Blogging, Mi Vida Loca, nonfiction, postaday, Stories of my life

She Giggled at the Word Vagina

**update** As of 5:40 pm mountain time today, Wednesday May 25, 2016 My mom passed away. Thank you for all your sympathy and well wishes for me and my family at this time. ❤ Good-bye Mom, I love you, tell Dad hi.

 

I’ve been pretty quiet since late last week. No posts, very little interacting on blogs. A couple of good friends know why. I emailed them over the weekend.

It’s been a tough time for me and going to be tougher the next little bit. It’s something I’ve expected the last few months, yet, now that the time is here….it’s almost unbearable. You see, my mom is dying. She has very little time left. We are talking hours here now, according to her doctors in Wisconsin.

I talked to her the day after Mother’s day and noticed she sounded very tired and wore out. Her sense of humor was still intact though as her and I laughed over something silly. The month before she had lost most of the use of her legs. They just gave out on her, so she was using a walker. We joked that her and my husband could have a walker race. She laughed and stated that she would win. That’s how she was. She accepted things and worked them to her advantage. She is the strongest person I know.

When I talked to my sister on Friday and she told me that mom was in the hospital and wasn’t expected to live much longer, my mind went to that last bit of silliness and that’s when the tears flowed. My mother loved life. She was a diminutive person with a larger than life personality. She IS…..She IS….soon to be WAS but not just yet.

 

JLPhillips 2013 (c)
JLPhillips 2013 (c)

 

Many of my readers know about my mom as I’ve written about her several times. We even gave her a great birthday last year when a lot of you sent her birthday cards. She was so happy when she got all those cards and recipes. I’m glad I was able to do that for her with your help. Thank you.

My mom would have turned eighty-seven in October of this year. That’s a long life. Her body is just worn out the doctors told my sister. After years of dialysis and various other illness’, her small frame could not handle any more.

I won’t be able to go and say good-bye to her. I don’t have the funds. I also have a sick husband to take care of. I feel slightly better knowing my mom and I discussed this very issue several months ago. She understood that I wouldn’t be able to come to her funeral when the time came. I have responsibilities here. She was good with it. It still hurts me. So much.

My sister and I have been talking on the phone every day since the initial call on Friday. If nothing else, this has brought her and I back together, at least for now. As many of you know, we hadn’t been on speaking terms for years. I don’t know why and this is not the time to ask. I’m just grateful for now.

She has all her funeral arrangements made and paid for. She did this right after Dad died. She’s going to be cremated and her ashes will be scattered close to where she scattered my Dad’s. She said she wanted to be close to him. My sister is going to scatter her ashes under the apple trees that dad planted shortly before he died. It’s also where there are rose bushes planted. She’d like that.

Her services will be at the Webber Hill funeral home in Wabeno, Wisconsin. Just like Dad’s. I know her and Dad will be happy to be together once more if that’s what happens in the afterlife. I like to think so. If anyone would like to send a card, please email me or contact me through my contact page and I will give you the address to send them to. Since my mom enjoyed all the wonderful birthday cards last year, I know she would get a kick out of these. My sister says she will set up a board at her services with all the cards tacked on.

As for the title of this post ‘She Giggled at the word Vagina’, there is a story to this. Years ago my dad or someone else (this part I’m fuzzy at) told her a joke about vaginas. She thought it was hilarious and she laughed and giggled. Anytime after that if someone just mentioned the word vagina she would throw up her hands and go “Oh! Hahahahahah.” She just thought the word itself was so funny and it never failed to make her giggle and laugh like a schoolgirl. It was fun to see and hear.

That’s what I remember the best….that laugh. That special laugh.

 

 

 

Posted in Blogging, nonfiction, postaday, Wednesday Whatever!

Wednesday Whatever! ~~ Things I Will Never Do

Wednesday

 

We’ve all seen bucket lists or made our own bucket lists. You know the kind…things we want to do before we die or before we turn 30, 40, 50, etc. I’ve decided to do a different kind of bucket list. Things I will never do while I live or things I will never do again. I try to learn by my mistakes and sometimes doing something once is enough for me.

I always did like being a bit different. So here’s my list…

  1. Never get married….again. Twice is two times too many. I’m getting too damn old to break in another man.
  2. I will never give up coffee. I know plenty people my age that either had to give up coffee or went to caffeine free. Which is giving up coffee, I mean what’s the point of drinking coffee if not for the caffeine? I will likely die with a hot cup of coffee gripped in my cold dead hand.
  3. I will not live with hatred or prejudice in my heart or my home. Period. That is not a way to live. We are all human and we are all brothers and sisters. No matter the color of our skin, the way we love someone, or our beliefs. I won’t force my thoughts on you, you just do the same and we can all live together in peace. Come on people, if we don’t have each other’s back who will? We together are all WE got. So let’s do it in love.
  4. I won’t let go of my dreams. We all have dreams, things we want to accomplish, things we want to create. Once we give those up, we lose ourselves to darkness. No matter how tired I am or how much I hurt, I refuse to give up my dreams.
  5. With number 4 comes this one…I won’t ever stop writing. It’s in my soul, my heart and my very being to write. I’m not saying I will always write good things but I will always write. I could live to be one hundred and I will still write. Of course by then we should be able to write without actually using our hands, technology is awesome. Plus, I need my hands for my coffee. 😉
  6. I will never be ungrateful for the help I receive from family and friends. I will always appreciate my friends for being who they are. 
  7. I will never be rich. Well, unless I win the lottery, which I don’t see happening. And that’s ok. Being rich would bring a whole new set of problems, not to mention, a whole bunch of relatives I didn’t know I had. ha! I might never be rich but I make do with what I have and am just grateful for a roof over my head. There have been a few times in my life when that was pretty doubtful so I’ve come to appreciate where I live, no matter how humble it is.
  8. I won’t give up learning. No matter how old I become I love learning new things, especially new technology things. I’m a nerd. 
  9. I will never stop cussing. An old fashion word for swearing, using curse words, saying things like hell, dammit, shit and f*** (although I rarely use that one). I’m a lady, but a lady with a mouth on her and who isn’t afraid to use it. It’s a part of me.
  10. I won’t jump out of an airplane. Uh, uh, not this girl. No way. 
  11. I won’t ever give up my optimism. Been on the other side before, the dark side. Won’t go there again. They lie you know…..they don’t have cookies!
  12. And for the even dozen….I won’t give up on my friends. They are friends for a reason. I love my friends. You might get depressed, you might hurt, you might even do yourself an injury but I will never give up on you! I will be there with my hand held out to help pull you out of the hole you are in. I will try my best to make you smile and bring a little light and love into your life when you need it. I. Will. Never. Give. You. Up! 

There you have it. Probably a bit cheesy on my end but it’s how I feel today.

by TolmanCotton
by TolmanCotton

 

What about you? What’s one thing you will never do?

Posted in Blogging, Mi Vida Loca, nonfiction, postaday, Stories of my life

Happy That Last Year is Over With!

Happy New Year, People!

As my post title says…I am so glad 2015 is over with and gone. Whew, that was a damn hard year. Not to be repeated, please. A good friend of mine did a post yesterday, not about resolutions, but about leaving things behind in the new year. As I don’t do resolutions either, I thought it was such a good idea that I stole it. Yes, I did. I’m not sorry either.

She’ll forgive me I’m sure.

So I’m going to make a list of things I’m going to leave behind in 2015. Good riddance and hello 2016!

 

only one way to go....let's leave the crap behind us

 

 

  1. Bad health. Mine and the husbands. Mostly his, I hope. Yes, I want to leave behind the bad health issues we faced in 2015. We have a good chance of doing this. First, I need to get my butt in gear and exercise. I already eat decently. I’m a diabetic, I have to. My problem is I sit too much. When I’m not doing housework, dishes, running to the store, giving the husband his pills, making stuff to eat. Yeah, other than all that I sit in my comfy, old office chair in front of my computer and type, or read. I need to get up and move more.

2. I need to leave behind procrastination. I’m an expert at it. Getting better every day. I really need to stop that and just get stuff done. There is so much I want to do. Like, write more books. A big highlight last year was publishing my two books. (You can buy them from Amazon, just click on the books on my sidebar!) I have been working on a third book in the series but it’s been slow going. I also have an idea about another book, something different I want to try. I’m hoping to do that too this new year.

3. Financial issues. Yeah, like that is going to happen. I’m nothing if not optimistic. Last year really sucked as far as the finances were concerned. I need to work on a better budget and work on generating more income for us. This is always a worry. I want to worry less and produce more. Just not too sure how I’m going to do that.

4. I want to leave behind my insecurities about my writing. I received a wonderful email from someone a few days ago. They had just finished reading The Canine Caper and loved it. They told me they hoped I kept on writing. That was a wonderful email to receive from someone I didn’t know. Obviously, some people enjoy my writing, so I need to quit doubting myself and just write!

5. Thinking my siblings are going to change their attitude toward me. Yeah, I really need to give that up as they aren’t going to change. It’s been too many years of me wishing things were different and things staying the same, or getting worse. I have no idea why I’m considered the black sheep of the family, but hey, I’ll take it. I always did like being different. I have my friends. Even if some are faraway, they are more like family than my family. Just goes to show, blood does not always make a difference.

6. I need to leave behind any heartache. Yes, I’ve had my fair share of heartache the past year. Not going into details, but lets just say family is not the only reason I hurt inside sometimes. I get foolish dreams once in a while. Expectations that can’t be met….of myself and others. Through no fault of theirs. I let my guard down and then expect things to happen that don’t and wham! Hurt feelings. I’m letting that go.

7. Adulting. Yes, you read that right! I’m leaving adulting behind. Frick it. I hate being an adult sometimes. Just kidding! Well, maybe I won’t leave it ALL behind. Just some of it. I need to have more fun. Really, I do. I’m way too serious most times. I need some fun and frolicking in my life. Anyone want to frolic with me?

I’m leaving it at seven. I like the number seven. You know what I won’t be leaving behind? YOU!

Yes, I promise not to leave you behind. So come join me this year. Let’s have some fun! Let’s party! Let’s be friends……You guys are great and thank you for sticking with me this past year. Thank you for helping me when it was so very difficult for me to ask for help. Thank you for being readers, commentors, big-hearted people and most of all, thank you for being who you are.

There were some of you that truly were friends. You let me whine to you, cry on your shoulder, share my worries, help me buy a mattress so I could get some much-needed sleep, bought my books and helped me make those same books a reality. I love you guys. Now let’s get going on 2016!!